Do you ever have those stages in your life where you feel like it is all going to the crapper?
This has been me for the past, shall we say month or so. Between migraines once a week and a variety of other unpleasant health concerns I have finally begun some form of 'treatment'. The blood tests, CT scan and other bits and pieces all came back negative only to leave two possible causes. 1. Stress and 2. an over production of insulin... so off to the dietician 'to rule out' blood sugar things. On an eating-every-two-hours plan. Still have the headaches, vommitting, tingling face and fatigue.... But, patience is apparently the key, along with no coffee or extra sugar, so in two weeks we will be able to determine whether I need to go to a general physician or continue on the current path of the dietician. Goodness knows I hope this ensures I lose the 6 kilos I have gained from stuffing my face with sugar to stop me from passing out or looking at people with no freakin idea what they are talking about. You know when you can hear the words but can't reply? Well, maybe you don't, but that's been me for some time. Now there is no Diet Coke, Coke Zero (apparently all very bad for you), Pepsi Max or any other caffenated drink. Oh, sorry, I am allowed 2 SMALL cups of coffee a day, I decided to go for none. I think two is just a tease. No extra sugar on anything, i.e. tea, porridge, biscuits all have to be plain...
On top of that we have termites! Those nasty wood eating critters. Why they can't stick to the acres of forest around us is beyond me, but no, our house is more appealing. Particularly the skirting boards of our bedroom and our cupboards and our bathroom....
There are various other things that are going on that make you wanna crawl under the desk and hide from the world, or those things where you just want to sit and howl but it just won't come...
I would like for Tony and me to feel like we have some control over our lives. That heading towards our 40's (ok I know I am only 31) we are financially stable and healthy, not worrying about whether our house is going to fall down around us before we can afford pest control, that we can start saving for family holidays or trips here and there, or that we don't have to phone these people and ask for an extension for our bill til next fortnight whilst trying to juggle another bill company.
...And then I go and feel all guilty, I have a lovely house (termiteless would make it beautiful), healthy and happy children, a husband who is my soul mate, a full time job which I love, fantastic friends who I just love and enough money to put food on the table and buy a few things 'here and there'.
I am told, that we all go through this, but tell me, what do we need to do to make it better????
Had one of those days that leave you smiling in the car on the way home. In my attempts to decerase the size of my stomach we loaded the car up with the kids bikes, our super comfy sneakers, the trusty camera and a bit of cash. Parked the car at the usual Kangaroo Point spot and began the treadling. Thank God Miss Jilly has learnt to ride without training wheels. Certainly makes a difference.
